


Opposites Attract: A Collection of Seddie Oneshots

by JjRavenclawFromDistrict11



Category: iCarly
Genre: Friendship, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-04
Updated: 2012-12-30
Packaged: 2015-06-18 18:46:55
Rating: T
Chapters: 11
Words: 11,223
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7435766/1/
Author URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/3229917/JjRavenclawFromDistrict11
Summary: A bunch of random SEDDIE oneshots I've written. Some are a little fluffy, some are not-quite-smutty, and some are a little angsty. All have happy endings- I'm not a big fan of the sad stuff.





	1. French Kiss

**Disclaimer: So, I tried to get iCarly by blackmail… **

**Me:"Give me iCarly or I'll tell everyone your SECRET!"**

**Dan: "No. Wait, what secret?"**

**Me: "YOU KNOW!"**

**Dan: "SECURITY!"**

**Long story short, I do not own iCarly.**

…French Kiss…

**(this is a slightly different version of Chapter 1 from "iDare You Not to Kiss Me" my first story)**

I still couldn't believe Melanie was real. I mean she didn't kiss as good as Sam (which is something Sam will NEVER hear from me-she'd break my body in way too many places) but still. Not that kissing Sam was enjoyable, of course. It was awkward kissing one of my best friends, but I was glad to get the whole first kiss thing off my chest. Those first few days after the kiss were a little weird too, and Carly was a little confused as to why we were acting so odd. I'm over it now though, it wasn't even that big a deal.

"FREDDIE!"

Crap. My crazy mom was trying to get me to take a tick bath. "I'll take a tick bath when I get home, OK Mom?"

"Well, only if you promise to eat something healthy at Carly's party."

"Sure, Mom." Like that was ever gonna happen. I slammed the door and crossed the hallway to the Shay's apartment. Since we've known each other for so long, I just walked in.

"Freddie! You came!"

I turned to find a tall blonde girl coming towards me; it was either Sam or Melanie. Judging by the pink dress, the heels, and the fact she called me Freddie, I figured it was Melanie.

"Melanie?" I asked to confirm my suspicion.

"Good job, what gave me away?" she teased as she handed me a glass of water. So much for junk food.

"Um, you didn't insult me when I came through the door…" I mumbled.

"Oh yeah, I forgot that Sam likes you."

"WHAT!" I yelled through what would have been in the running for world's best spit take.

"You haven't figured that out yet?" Melanie asked innocently.

"Sam does NOT like me", I said, stating the obvious, "she hates me."

Melanie laughed, "That's just her cover up", she said, then sashayed away.

I'm starting to think this Melanie chick is crazier than Sam is.

…

Around midnight, we started running out of fun stuff to do. Sam refused to play spin the bottle (I don't blame her) and nobody cared to watch the horror movie she'd brought- it was rated RR or some similar rating that I never knew existed. That's how we ended up playing truth or dare. My mom had finally decided to cut me some slack and let me stay longer. Thank God, Jesus, Buddha, and every other holy thing out there. Me, Spencer, Carly, Sam, Melanie, Gibby, and Brad were all that were left. Spencer was going to play, but he fell asleep on the couch. The rest of us moved into the studio and started playing. We put each of our names in a hat and that's how victims were picked. Carly picked first, and got Gibby.

"Dare."

"Aw, come on!" Carly complained. "What is there that Gibby wouldn't do willingly?"

Gibby shrugged. Carly thought for a moment and laughed.

"I've got it. Gibby, I dare you to squirt ketchup and mustard on people going past Bushwell and then yell, 'It's raining condiments!'"

Gibby sighed. "That's all?"

Carly frowned. "Well yeah… "

"Oh well", Gibby said-clearly disappointed, "Let's go get the rain."

Carly and Gibby headed downstairs to get the condiments while the others continued the game. Melanie was next. She reached into the hat and pulled out Sam's name.

"Dare."

Sam was grinning, so I figured either Melanie either gave easy dares or was about to explode.

"Okay- Sam, I dare you to French kiss Freddie for at least 20 seconds."

"Excuse me?" Sam asked, wide eyed. It would have been funny if- actually it was hilarious. Period.

"I dare you to French Freddie." I plugged my ears.

"!"

I was pretty sure that woke up Spencer and worried Carly and Gibby but none of them surfaced.

"Are you too chicken?" Melanie asked. Doesn't this chick value her life? She must have a death wish, because Sam's gonna kill her. She smiled, clearly enjoying Sam's irritation. Sam balled her fists.

"NO! Fine, I'll French the nub if you'll shut up."

Wait, what?

She scowled and walked over to me.

"Ready Benson?"

"Um… no."

"Good."

She grabbed my shoulders and our lips smashed together. This was too weird. Within four seconds her tongue was in my mouth and within nine my tongue was in hers. It felt good, I'm not gonna lie. I couldn't imagine what my mom would say if she saw me French kissing a delinquent. After our 20 seconds were up (Melanie and Brad had been counting), we pulled apart and blushed. I got up and then realized Melanie and Brad were making out on the balcony.

"Yo, Fredgeek- wanna kiss?"

Before I could respond, Sam pulled me into another kiss.

I could get used to this.

**REVIEW!**


	2. Letters Never Sent

**Disclaimer: Dan said I could have iCarly when it rains giant purple lemons. **

**So I don't own iCarly. YET.**

…Letters Never Sent…..

**(In case you haven't guessed these are notes Freddie and Sam wrote that they never sent)**

I hit you because it's easier to be enemies

I prank you because you laugh afterward

I hurt you because I've been hurt so many times before

I call you names because you always forgive me

I make you mad because you let me

I stay friends with you because you're the only one that cares

I tell you I hate you because I don't how to say I love you

I never thought I could fall in love with someone like you

I tried to deny it but it wouldn't go away

I tried to ignore it but it just got stronger

Those feelings I had are still here, still real

I guess what I'm trying to say is

I love you Fredward Benson

And I always will.

….

I used to hate the way you treated me

I used to hate the pranks

The names you called me

I used to love your best friend

I used to hate everything about you

But now I love the way we fight all the time

I love the way you always win

And the smile that appears every time you do

I don't love your best friend anymore

Because I'm in love with you.


	3. Tricks and Truths

**Disclaimer: Once there was a show called iCarly, owned by a man named Dan.**

**I asked him if he could give it to me, he said, "Why I certainly can!**

"**But I don't think I will."**

**And then I said: "F&% YOU!"**

…Tricks and Truths…

**(I edited this like 40,000,000 times so it took forever to get online. Sorry.)**

I was pretty surprised when my best friends walked to their lockers holding hands. Even more so when they kissed right in front of me. "Um… HELLO!"

The two jerked apart and faced me. "Oh, Hey Sam", she said casually.

"'Hey Sam? You were makin' on Freddie and all you have to say is 'Hey Sam'!"

"I'm right here!" Freddie cut in.

Carly glanced at Freddie and grinned. "So I guess I don't need to tell that we're dating, do I?

"You're WHAT?"

Carly laughed. "Me and Freddie are dating! I finally took him up on his offer and he's such a gentleman. "Freddie's a PERFECT boyfriend. I'm so head over heels!"

Freddie grinned like a maniac. "I love you too, baby."

I grimaced. "Could you tone that down, you're making me nauseous."

Freddie rolled his eyes, "Don't be so dramatic."

"Yea, Sam. Chillax", Carly remarked. Her and Freddie kissed again then faced me.

"No I really do feel s-" I paused, feeling bile rising up my throat. "AW, CHIZZ!"

I clamped my hand over my mouth and made a dash for the bathroom. I puked twice and leaned against the cold stall door.

"Sam are you OK?"

Freddie? What was he doing in the girl's bathroom? Oh, shit. "Please tell me I'm not in the boy's bathroom."

"Well, you kinda are…"

"Aw, crap."

"Sam, you know how Carly feels about swearing."

I huffed, "Well Carly ain't here is she?" I heaved into the toilet again.

"Are you alright?"

"If I was alright, I wouldn't be puking in the boy's bathroom, now would I?"

Freddie sighed and I heard the nurse come in. She let me go home (not that that would help since my mom was home) and I crashed in my room. Whatever stomach bug I had was gone the next morning but I didn't go to school. After a few hours, I couldn't take it anymore. Something was bothering me and I couldn't figure it out. I screamed and my cat, Frothy, ran out of the room. Stupid cat. Stupid Freddie. Wait, where did that come from? Oh crap. No, nonononono, this is not happening to me! I rammed my fist against the wall and was only half surprised that I'd created a hole in it. I thought for a moment. I could fix this, I just had to- "BABY, BABY, BABY!"

When my phone blared Justin (F&% you) Bieber, it could only mean one thing; Freddie was calling me. I let it go to voicemail. Then, I called Carly. She picked up on the first ring.

"Sam? Oh my god, are you okay? Freddie said you got sick."

"I did. But…" I hesitated.

"That's not what you called about, is it? Something's bothering you."

"Yeah it's just… Freddie. "

"What about him?"

I braced myself, "I think you guys should break up."

"Why?" Carly asked calmly. Calmly? CALMLY?

"Promise you won't hate me. And you can't tell him."

"I swear", she said solemnly.

"I… like Freddie. LIKE like him."

"We'll break up tomorrow. Okay?"

"Really? Are you sure? I mean-"

"Sam", Carly interrupted ,"I just wanted the truth from you. I wondered if you cared about him more than you lead us to think."

"What about Freddie? You totally played him!"

"He'll get over it."

I hung up. I admit, I didn't think Carly would do it. And I said more than I wanted to. I guess she was right though, about Freddie getting over it; he's been dealing with rejection since we met. But never from me. I just cared enough to lie to him. I made sure he was always okay in the end.

…..

The next day was pretty normal. Or at least, it started that way.

News of the "Creddie" breakup spread quickly and I slept through most of school as usual. Things started getting weird about lunch. I hadn't seen Carly or Freddie all day, because they're in more advanced classes than I am, but we always eat lunch together. So, Carly showed up on time as usual but Freddie, I noticed, was missing. "Where's the dorkface?"

Carly raised her eyebrows, "I thought you said you-"

"-HATE-"

"-him", she finished.

I breathed a sigh of relief and glared poison daggers at her. Carly seemed to get the message and continued on like nothing had happened. "Freddie's doing weird techy stuff in the computer lab. Wanna ditch him and eat outside?"

Clearly, today was NOT normal. Carly doesn't "ditch" anything. Ever. "Um… sure."

We got outside and Carly promptly left me alone to fix her makeup.

No sooner than I sat down. Than Freddie sat right next to me. And I mean RIGHT next to me.

" Hey, Sammy."

"Since when are you allowed to call me Sammy?"

He grinned and leaned towards me. "Since, I fell in love with a blonde-headed demon."

We kissed and I decided that maybe I'd thank Carly for breaking her promise. And maybe, just this once, I'd let my emotions show. "I love you too, nub. I love you too."

**BTW: I have nothing against JB (not a Belieber but I like "Never Say Never), but that seemed like a Sam kiind of thing to write- ya know- 'cause she "hates" but actually likes Freddie and Justin Bieber.**


	4. Timeline

**DISCLAIMER: Honestly, guys.**

**I AM NOT A MALE NOR AM I DAN SCHNEIDER!**

**If I were, Seddie would never have broken up!**

**When will you ever learn…**

…Timeline…

**(Randomness I came up with at a graduation ceremony I was forced to sit through)**

November 17, 2008-

Sam found out that I haven't kissed anyone yet. She told EVERYONE! Seriously, she broadcast to the entire world (via iCarly) that I have never kissed a girl. I hate her. Everybody at school is making fun of me. Honestly, I hate her. I will never forgive Sam for this. Never.

November 18, 2008-

I had my first kiss tonight… with Fredward Benson. I know, what was I thinking? I guess I felt bad for ruining his life and all. Besides we just wanted to get it over with- it's not like I have feelings for the nub. I'll have to torture him extra to make up for this. Anyway, it's not like I have feelings for Fredward Benson, of all people! Did I already say that? Damn…

June 19, 2009-

Carly found out that Sam and I kissed. She was… surprised? Shocked? Angry? Jealous? I don't know. She asked us if we liked the kiss or not, and now I can't stop thinking about it. Every time I fall asleep, I dream about that night. It's as though the kiss- Sam's kiss- is haunting me. But the question never leaves. Did I like it? It torments me. You might ask, why? Because I think that I did.

April 8, 2010-

Carly and Freddie are dating. It's… weird. Fredklutz got hit by a taco truck and Carly thinks he's a "hero" or whatever. I can't stand seeing them together, but I don't know why. Fredwardo has wanted this forever- do I just want him to keep being miserable? Or could I be… jealous?

April 10, 2010

Carly and I broke up. Sam thinks that I'm foreign bacon- that Carly only likes me because I saved her life. She might be right. Still, why would I break up with CARLY- the girl I've had a crush on for years? I have always been able to deal with her breaking my heart before, besides she was practically begging me not to break up with her. Why did I do it? WHY? It's not only because of me being bacon. I'm so confused.

May 22, 2011

I kissed Freddie. I KISSED FREDDIE. I KISSED FREDDIE! I think there's something wrong with me.

May 24, 2011

Sam kissed me at the lock-in two days ago. I haven't seen her since. I'm worried about her. I don't know what happened. I wish I could find her. I hope Carly doesn't find out. If Carly finds out, she'll ask me if I like Sam. I don't think I can answer that question. Or maybe I just don't want to.

May 25, 2011

Troubled Waters isn't THAT bad. As far as mental hospitals go anyways. Carly and Freddie found me today. They're gonna bust me out… somehow. I admitted that I liked Freddie to him (and Carly knows everything) even though I wasn't admitting it to myself. I'm scared. There, I said it. I'm scared of what is gonna happen when I get out of here. Should I stay?

May 26, 2011

I kissed Sam today. She was mad at Carly for telling everyone (via iCarly) that she likes me. She was mad at me. She was scared of me. I didn't want her to be scared- Sam doesn't GET scared. I kissed her because… I like her too. Carly was a crush, but Sam's the real deal. It's insane, I know. But sometimes it's okay to be a little crazy. Besides, I was already in a mental hospital.

May 29, 2011

Freddie and I are dating! We fight a lot though… I really like him. But why? He's a complete and total nub. What if this isn't meant to be? What if it doesn't last?

May 31, 2011

My mom offered me a LOT of money to break up with Sam. I refused. Gibby begged me to dump her… and ended up in the hospital. I said no. I found out that Sam messed up my application to N.E.R.D. camp. I almost did it. I almost ended it. But we're still together. Thank you, Carly. That would've been the biggest mistake of my life.

June 7, 2011

Freddie and I broke up tonight. I can't believe it. I knew this would happen- it was too good to be true. But… he told me that he loved me. I love him, too. I love Freddie Benson.

December 3, 2011

I can't take it anymore. I'm completely, utterly, hopelessly in love with her. I have to do something.

February 1, 2012

Freddie gave me a ring today. It's not an engagement ring, but it's a promise. He told me that he's in love with me, and wishes that he'd never broken up with me last June. It wasn't his fault. We broke up because we're too different. I have to accept that. I turned him down. I know there are lots of girls that would be better for Freddie than me. I want what's best for him- I want him to be happy. I know I did the right thing. But I still love him. He is my Romeo- we can never be together.

March 1, 2012

I tried again today. I will never settle for another woman. I LOVE SAM! Why can't she accept that?

April 1, 2012

Freddie asked again today. He asks every month for another chance. Why can't he see that that is what I'm giving him? I can't even look at him anymore. It hurts too much…

May 1, 2012

I tried again. Denied. WHY? Please, God-if you're listening- let Sam understand. I need her. I love her.

June 1, 2012

I can't do this any longer. I love you, Freddie, but you have to let me go. There is no escape. I can't do it anymore. I can't.

June 2, 2012

Sam attempted suicide last night. She took an overdose of pills, and now she's in the hospital. She might not live. This is all my fault.

June 6, 2012

I was released from the hospital today. I'm… in a wheelchair. They said I might regain use of my legs. Maybe.

June 9, 2012

Sam told me that she wishes we could be friends again. I don't want to hurt her anymore, but I want to be here for her. Sam and I are speaking to each other semi-normally. Things will never be the same.

July 1, 2012

Freddie asked again. Over the last month, we've become friends again. He asked me if I could honestly tell him that I had no feelings for him at all. I couldn't lie. I know it may be incredibly selfish, but Freddie has been trying to get me back since February. I may not be the best for him, but I DO make him happy. We're going to give it another try.

July 1, 2013

I proposed to Sam today. She said YES! I couldn't be happier. I am the luckiest man alive.

July 1, 2014

I am a married woman. Samantha Marie Benson. My name is Sam Benson. I am the luckiest girl alive.

October 26, 2014

Sam is pregnant. I'm going to be a dad. I'M GOING TO BE A DAD! I am the luckiest man alive.

July 1, 2015

Melanie Carlotta Benson was born today at 8:46am weighing 6 lbs, 6oz. I am the luckiest girl alive.

July 1, 2064 **(A/N I FIXED IT! XD)**

We have been married for 50 years now. We had a small celebration, with only our very best friends and family. They all came. Melanie had twins last week. (Our son) Spencer's wife is expecting. Carly Shay is expecting another grandson. Spencer Shay is now a world renowned artist. Gibby is going to be a grandfather soon. We are the happiest people alive.

…-~-…-~-…-~-…-~-…

**Sorry about the wait for this! Things are… complicated. Also, the next oneshot will be my last. I have it written and promise to update by tomorrow night, K? SORRY!**


	5. Pickpocket

**DISCLAIMER: I have tried EVERYTHING to own iCarly**

**Changing my name to "Dan Schneider" did not work**

**Asking Dan for the rights did not work**

**Begging Dan for the rights did not work**

**Blackmailing Dan for the rights did not work**

**Kidnapping Dan did not work**

**Stealing the rights did not work**

**So now…**

**I'm trying to cross-breed birds and pigs**

'**cause Dan said I could have the rights to iCarly**

"**WHEN PIGS FLY"**

…Pickpocket…

**(I have been thinking about this Scenario ever since I started writing FF so here it goes…)**

Freddie was acting weird.

We'd been dating for 2 years- although no one thought we would last that long- and were about to celebrate our anniversary. Freddie had booked us a reservation at Pini's, where we had our first date. I wore a purple knee-length dress with one shoulder. Carly had picked out strappy sandals to match, but I opted for a pair of white Converse (with purple accents, custom made for "Seddie"). Freddie picked me up in his black Prius, wearing a suit with a purple tie and black Converse. Honestly, I couldn't have planned it better myself. But then, Freddie was all… formal. Our relationship worked because we could be ourselves around each other, but he was really tense.

"Are you OK, Freddie? You seem tense."

He rubbed the back of his neck like he does when he's thinking. "Tough day at work. Sorry, Sam…"

Freddie was an assistant at the Pear Company. He had days like this a lot. I often felt bad that he had a job and I didn't, and that he would pay for all my food and meat cravings (which were frequent and large). Still, no matter how many times I offered to pay for myself, he declined.

"S'okay, Fredward."

"I thought we were done with the name-calling…?"

"Never."

He chuckled softly. "OK, _Samantha_."

"Freddie! You know I hate it when you call me that!"

"Well, I don't like being called Fredward… even if it IS my name. Besides, how is it OK for you to call me Fredward but not OK for me to call you Samantha?"

"It just is."

We both laughed a little louder, and Freddie relaxed a tad. I kissed him and wrapped my arms around his waist. Through the haze that always accompanies kissing that man, I noticed an unusual… lump. I made it my mission to find out what the lump in his jacket was.

We pulled apart, but before I could try anything, he beckoned me into the car. I knew he hated to be late, so I got into the car, wordlessly.

When we pulled up to Pini's, Freddie opened the door for me and I saw my opportunity. I jumped out of the car and grabbed his shoulders, pulling him into a kiss. Freddie saw no reason to argue and slipped his arms around my waist, kissing me back passionately. I nearly forgot my mission in the fog of the kiss, but remembered shortly. His jacket was loose enough that I was able to slip my hand inside without Freddie's knowledge. I found the lump, slowly slipped it out of the inside pocket of his jacket, pocketed it, and allowed myself to enjoy the kiss.

Finally, Freddie pulled away and led me inside. We were seated in a booth by the windows, and after I ordered my meal, I excused myself to "wash my hands".

In the restroom (where I DID NOT wash my hands) I looked at the lump. I examined it. I stared at it.

"Oh my god. Is this… OH MY GOD!"

…-~-…-~-…-~-…-~-…

Sam came out of the bathroom looking dazed. She plopped down across from me and huffed

"Where's the food?"

I sighed. "It's only been like, 5 minutes, Sam. The food is still being cooked."

"Oh."

We sat there for a moment in silence. _Geez, Freddie- loosen up! Say something!_

"So…"

Thankfully, the waiter came then. He brought a MOUNTAIN of food (most of which was for Sam). We ate with zeal. Then I ordered us dessert and prepared myself.

"Sam…"

…-~-…-~-…-~-…-~-…

Freddie took a deep breath. "I love you, Sam. Will you…"

My heart thundered inside my chest.

He reached inside his jacket pocket, then frowned. "No! I had it! Not now!"

I put my hand on his arm. "Freddie?"

He looked up at me.

"Yes."

"What?"

I showed him my left hand, which now displayed a beautiful diamond wedding ring.

"Yes, of course I'll marry you, Freddie. I love you, too."

He stared at me in shock and I shrugged sheepishly. Then beads of water began to seep from my eyes.

"Oh, no. I'm sorry, Freddie. I don't mean to be such a girl…"

"Oh, Sam."

I looked up at him. "What?"

"Don't ever change."

**So there it is- my last oneshot (for now...)**


	6. The One With a Million Endings

**OK, so I hate it when people make an Author's note an entire chapter because this is what happens:**

**You: YES! Another chapter!**

***sees A/N***

**You: Bloody hell…**

**So I made an entire new oneshot just to tell you all that… **

_**THIS STORY IS ON HIATUS!**_

**From time to time I may put a new oneshot up, but it may be rare. Anyways…**

**Disclaimer: My name is Jill, and I own all rights to iCarly.**

**Investigator: LIAR!**

**Me: I'm no liar!**

**Investigator: Well the lie detector says you are.**

**Me: …**

…The One With a Million Endings…

**(This started as a very strange dream about my best friend and ended up as… whatever this is)**

My mom decided that we aren't religious enough, so she sent me on a church mission trip. A friggin CHURCH. MISSION. TRIP. God…

**(FYI- I had to add this- I love church and go on a mission trip every year. I was just trying to make this less OOC. Please don't take any offense.)**

What's worse: Freddie's on this thing too.

Yep- it's official- my mom wants to kill me. Frenmunch's techy talk+ church people preaching at me from ALL DIRECTIONS+ charity= death.

Carly: You can have my Michael Jackson CD's

Spencer: My bed sheets and paints are all yours- for whatever sculpture you create next

Gibby: Well I know you don't want my shirts… go ahead and take the liquid soap under my sink

Mom: You can have my clothes and my room back

Frothy: Make sure somebody feeds you

Fredward: You are part of the reason I'm dead so you don't get anything. TAKE THAT YOU MURDERER!

So now I'm off.

~.. A week later..~

I'm alive! One more car ride with the church peoples and Fredloser and I'm HOME! Or, more likely, at Carly's place.

I look at Fredilina, noticing the odd look on his face and the way he wasn't talking. At all.

At first I'm pleased to have a silent ride. But then the silence just gets weird and incredibly uncomfortable. I decide that something has to be done.

So I punch Fredwimp in the shoulder. He completely ignores me.

I scowl at him and he still ignores me. What now?

I pull out a piece of paper and write in sloppy handwriting, "What's up? You look like someone told you that you were losing IQ by the day. What doctors have Crazy taken you to now?"

I pass him the note and he frowns as he reads it. Finally- a reaction! He scrawls something on it and passes it back.

"There in NO way I would go to you if I had a problem. What makes you think that has changed?"

I pass it back with a response, "Awww, c'mon! Just pretend I'm Carly."

His frown deepens and he sends it back. "No."

I sigh. Now I'm a TINY BIT worried. He's not even trying to make a good comeback.

"Seriously", I write, "What's wrong? I promise not to make fun."

He raises his eyebrows and passess the note back. Written on it in neat handwriting is, " I don't want to talk about it. Not here. Not with you. Not with anyone. Leave me alone, Sam."

I knit my eyebrows together but leave the nub alone. Whatever it is, he isn't gonna tell. Besides- what can possibly be so disturbing? He's probably bluffing or he broke his laptop.

We get back to the church and file out of the bus thing. As it turns out, Freddie's mom had to stay at the hospital and will be one or two hours late. My mom might show up but probably not. I should walk home but…

This is my chance to figure out what's up with Fredaluape.

He shifts back and forth on his feet, knowing there is no escape.

I smile, "So Benson, we ain't in that autothing anymore. What's up?"

"I don't want to talk about this, Sam."

"Too bad."

I grab the back of Freddie's shirt and drag him into the tiny church Lost & Found.

He was cornered.

Plus, Fredwardo has known me long enough that BAD things will happen if he doesn't do what I say.

"WHAT'S WRONG?"

He looks like he's debating whether or not to tell me. Finally, he slumps forward, sighing.

"If I tell you, you'll laugh at me."

"I promise I won't."

"I don't believe you."

I glance at his expression. He's not buying it. "How can I make you believe me?"

"Why do you even care? You hate me."

"I… don't know."

"Fine, I'll tell you what. You give me all the food, gum, candy, and anything else consumable that you have with you. That means no ham, bacon, or other meat. NO. FAT. CAKES."

I gasp. "No Fat Cakes? You can't expect me to…"

"It's the only way you'll get the truth out of me."

"No Fat Cakes at all?"

"Nope."

"Not even one?"

"No."

I decide to do the right thing. I am in a church, after all. " Fine, I'll do it."

I pull all the edible food from my luggage. Even some expired meat I kept for an emergency. Freddie wrinkled him nose, then put it all in his bag. I stare expectantly at him.

"Well…?" I prompt.

"I…" Freddie says hesitantly. "I can't do this, Sam."

"Come ON! I gave up all of my food for this! Spill."

He stares at the ground. "I think… I think I might be gay."

"You WHAT?" I leap to my feet, shocked. This was not what I expected at all.

He continues to examine the shag carpet.

I get hold of myself. "Why would you think that? You've liked Carly forever."

"I… don't like Carly at all. I'm not sure I ever did. I think I was just psyching myself out."

I try to process this. Freddie's GAY? This has to be some kind of joke. "So what? That's just one girl."

"But that's the thing, Sam. It's always been Carly. I don't thing I've ever had a legitimate girl crush."

"Wow." I try to come up with another reason he can't be gay. I can honestly say that this scenario ever crossed my mind. "Have you ever even kissed a girl?"

**(For this FF, Seddie never kissed, K?)**

"…No."

"Well, there you go! How can you know whether you like girls if you haven't kissed one? Unless you have a boy crush…"

"I don't."

"Oh… good." I try to smile.

"Sam, what girl is going to kiss ME?"

"Umm..." I hadn't thought of this.

"See? I'm going to die alone", Freddie says dejectedly.

I feel so bad for him. I'm always so tough on him but he is one of my best friends and one of the few people that tolerate me. I speak without thinking.

"I'll do it."

I slap my hand over my mouth and Fredwierd stares in shock.

"Please, Sam. You… don't have to do that."

But I know I have to. "No. I'm gonna do it."

Before he can protest, my lips are on his. I can't tell whether he likes it or not because he's so startled.

After a moment or so, I pull away and ask, "So?"

"You actually did it. I can't believe you kissed me."

Clearly, this boy was NOT paying attention. I have to go bigger.

I grab the nub by his shirt collar, kissing him violently. Then, I slide the tip of my tongue across his lips. He opens his mouth, letting me in. It's not BAD kissing Freddie, but he isn't responding correctly. Maybe, he's still in shock. I don't know.

I ensnare my fingers in his hair, pulling him even closer. Finally, he starts to respond. He hesitantly puts his hands around my waist. We stay like that for a while before I decide to go a little further.

I shove the boy to the floor, straddling him. I pull away from the kiss and begin sucking on a sensitive spot on his neck. He moans quietly, and I think that it might be working.

I slip my hands up his shirt and massage little circle on his chest. Damn, he's got a six-pack. He moans a little louder.

I don't know why I'm not stopping, what posseses me to continue. But I keep going.

Soon enough, I notice a small tent rising on Freddie's jeans. I move back to his mouth, smiling into the kiss as I proceed. I rub against the mound. Freddie moans into my mouth.

Then I pull away, and he literally whimpers as I do.

"So, I ask, "How do you feel?"

**(I had SO many ideas for here so this one of my faves. Alternate endings will be directly below.)**

**{Ending 1}**

"Very non-gay. Will you do me a big favor?"

"Anything."

"Keep going. Tis room isn't tainted enough." He smiled at me sexily.

God, I'm more turned on than he is.

"I agree."

And that's how I ended up having sex with Fredward Benson at the church's Lost & Found.

**YAY! Here are some alternate endings. Which one is your favorite?**

**{Ending 2}**

"So", I ask, "How do you feel?"

"Sinful."

"What do you mean?"

"We just made out in church…"

**{Ending 3}**

"So?, I ask, "How do you feel?"

"I'm definitely not gay."

"Great."

"Please do that again."

**{Ending 4}**

"So?, I ask, "How do you feel?"

"I'm so turned on right now…"

**{Ending 5}**

"So?, I ask, "How do you feel?"

"Guilty."

"How so?"

"I just tricked you into making out with me…"


	7. Pain

**Hey guys! So I decided it was time to upload a new oneshot and update you on my stories. The epilogue for "iDare You Not to Kiss Me" is being beta'd- some technical issues made it take longer than I would have predicted, but it is being fixed. I am also currently writing 2 new SEDDIE stories:**

"**iCan't Dance"** is a new chapter long story. It will all be from Sam's POV.

**SUMMARY:** Sam is going to perform in a talent competition- she'll be dancing! (See iWas a Pageant Girl.) But since her boyfriend can't dance, she's forced to take on an unlikely partner...

**UPDATES:** Every week on Sunday if possible.

"**Subconscious" **is another oneshot collection.

**SUMMARY:** Basically, each chapter will be an iCarly episode. It will describe Sam and Freddie's REAL thoughts- what you don't know from just watching the show. I may also include others' thoughts about Seddie. Episodes I plan to include: iKiss, iWin a Date, iMake Sam Girlier, iReunite With Missy, iMust Have Locker 239, iTwins, iThink They Kissed, iSaved Your Life, and many others.

**UPDATES:** Updates every other Thursday.

**Disclaimer: Dan Schneider. Yup, that's me. Why am I writing FanFiction? Umm… Nickelodeon wouldn't put it on TV? Yea, that's it. Why did I break up Sam and Freddie? ... No comment… Why am I ending iCarly? … No comment… Why am I so terrible at convincing people I'm Dan Schneider? ... I'm not Dan schneider...**

…Pain…

**(An idea I've had for a while… )**

_I sit on the bathroom floor, tears pouring down my face. Why? Why me? Why had God chosen me to get this awful lot? Death might be better. I pull the Altoids tin from my backpack. I finished it months ago. I keep it because my blade is there. I realized I would need it with me all the time. I pull it out and draw it across my wrist, knowing the familiar feeling. Blood slides down my arm, dripping to the floor. Too much. I have cut too deeply this time._

...

I was late to class. I'm not usually late, but I had to leave school to go see the dentist. I'd missed about half of sociology.

As I walked by the bathrooms, I paused. Someone was crying in the girls bathroom. I knew I shouldn't go in there. I knew I should just go to class. But I also knew that I would hate myself forever if I didn't go in there and help her.

I hesitated for a moment with my hand on the door before pushing it open. Just as I did, I heard a voice yell "Shit!" and the sound of something metal clattering to the floor.

I knelt down to see which stall she was in. What I saw shocked me more than words can say.

In the second to last stall, I could see the metal thing that had clattered to the floor. It was a razor blade, and it was coated with blood.

But that's not the worst part. Blood was dripping on the floor as a familiar voice muttered words I couldn't make out. Next to the growing pool of blood was a pair of purple converse hi-tops with orange paint splatters on them.

They were Sam's shoes.

I knew because I was there when Spencer "accidentally" flicked the paint on them. Sam was really pissed because they were brand new. Later, they became her favorite shoes. They were totally unique, just like her.

"Sam?"

Silence.

I walked to the stall door and tried it. It was locked.

"Sam? I know it's you."

"Leave me alone", came the raspy reply.

I knocked on the door, "Sam, please. I want to help."

"Leave me the hell alone, Freddie."

I sighed and walked into the next stall. By standing on the toilet, I could see her easily. I wished that I couldn't. Her arm was a bloody mess. It looked too deep to just be a coping mechanism. It looked like… a suicide attempt.

I pulled myself over the wall and stood next to her. She was sitting on the toilet lid staring at her arm. Well, at least until I dropped in. Then she started glaring at me.

"Get the hell away. Why are you even in here? Unless I'm mistaken, this is the GIRL'S bathroom."

There were huge black streaks running down her face. God, how had I never noticed?

I had trouble finding words. Honestly, I'd had a crush on Sam for years. I was just too scared of being rejected and made fun of to do anything about it. As time went on, I fell deeper and deeper in love with Sam. Still, I did nothing. Should I have said something? Was there something I could have done to keep this from happening? Even there, standing in that bathroom stall, I didn't know what to say.

Finally, I croaked out, "Why?"

"'Why?'" she scoffed. "Come on, Freddie, we aren't five. Why do you think?"

"I…"

"My mom is a terrible human being. She brings her boyfriends home to do whatever they want to me. I've been molested, raped, beaten. She beats me if I try to run. And I have dyslexia. I can't read so I have terrible grades. I'll never get into college and I'll never be able to leave. Carly is my only real friend- you just put up with me so she'll like you. I've never had a solid boyfriend because I'm just not pretty enough." She started crying, "How am I supposed to cope? I can't afford a shrink, Freddie. Besides, they just don't understand. Carly won't get it. She's so innocent. I have to… hurt myself… to feel better. There's no other way. I just don't know…"

Sam burst into tears and I pulled her into my arms. She cried into my shoulder and I noticed how much blood she was losing. I pulled some toilet paper from the roll and pressed it to the cut.

Sam winced. "Ouch!"

"Sorry."

She looked at me sadly. "I wasn't trying to… to end it. But sometimes… I want to. I don't know what to do anymore, Freddie. I need help."

"What if instead of using pain to feel better you used… pleasure?"

"What do you mean?"

In answer, I pulled her into a passionate kiss. Startled, she moved away.

"What… do you think this will work?"

"Of course it will."

And with that, our lips smashed together. Her mouth was hot and breathy. She trembled, but in a good way. I felt guilty, knowing that I was enjoying it so much.

But she seemed to enjoy it as much as I was. So I never got to sociology. Instead, I made out with a bleeding, pained girl in a bathroom stall.

Pain won't touch her any more.

She will never feel the pain of hard life or her blade. I won't let it.

Love has no room for pain.

…

**So… that was really emo. Sorry if you hated it. Review if you loved it. Byee!**


	8. 2008b

**FOREWARD: **in the episode "_iChristmas_", Carly wishes that Spencer was born normal and visits an alternate reality (2008a) where he was. Everything is awful, and she realizes how lucky she is to have a crazy brother like Spencer when she returns to her reality (2008). The next three chapters are twists of this episode, in which Sam and Freddie wish something they later regret. ENJOY!

**Disclaimer:**

**I totally own iCarly. Dan stopped the show, so it's mine now.**

**AND**

**I have a pet unicorn.**

**Seriously, I DO NOT own iCarly. K?**

...2008b...

**(This is something I wrote for another story of mine... just thought I'd put it here as well. 3-shot)**

"She's never gonna go out with you."

I jumped and saw Sam standing next to me. She must have seen me watching Carly leave.

"You've been ogling after Carly since you met her. She doesn't like you like that. Give up already."

I frowned. She was right. Still…

"She could learn to like me like that. Maybe one day-"

"You never listen, do you? Read my lips: SHE. WILL. NEVER. LOVE. YOU. Move on!"

"TO WHO?" The words came up like vomit- unstoppable and disgusting. "You said it yourself, Sam-remember? 'No girl you've met will ever go out with you'. And you know what? You're probably right. That's the awful truth. I'll always be Carly's nerdy friend behind the camera. She's the only thread of hope I have. I have to pray that one day, she'll love me and I won't be alone forever!"

She looked shocked, but the words weren't through spewing out.

"And you-You're one to talk! Boys are too afraid of you to ask you out! Have you ever had a solid relationship? NO! You probably haven't even really liked a guy, HAVE YOU? For all I know, you could be gay. And you think you can give ME romantic advice? You don't care! You never cared about me or Carly or anyone! You only care about yourself!"

I'd never seen Sam look so hurt- she looked like I'd slapped her. I screamed in frustration and ran home.

Why couldn't Carly just like me back? Everything would be so much easier.

**I wish Carly loved me. **

...

_I reached my apartment and sighed. I pushed on the door, only to find that it was locked. _

_I fished around for my key. It wasn't there._

_I groaned and decided to hang out at Carly's instead. I walked in and almost passed out._

"_CONGRATS!"_

_About a hundred people were there. They were all wearing party hats and slapping me on the back. I looked around frantically for a familiar face._

"_GIBBY! What's going on? Why are all these people congratulating me?"_

"_Like you don't know." Gibby elbowed me and winked._

"_I DON'T!"_

"_Sure you don't…" Gibby sauntered off, humming to himself._

_What the hell?_

_I noticed a particular blonde lingering in a corner with a cup full of punch._

"_Sam? How'd you get here so fast? You know what- it doesn't matter. I'm really sorry about what I said and…" I trailed off._

_Sam looked terrified. Of me? I noticed a huge scar on her cheek. _

"_Oh my God! Sam- who did this to you?"_

_She glanced frantically around. "Don't pretend you don't know, Freddie. I know it's my fault. I shouldn't have… well you know." She stared at her shoes. "You shouldn't be talking to me. She'll get mad."_

"_Who?"_

_She seemed to find whatever-or whoever- she'd been watching for before. _

"_Shit."_

_She pulled a flask from her coat and gulped down a mouthful._

"_I gotta go."_

_She ran for the door and the crowd parted. Not for her, though._

_Carly came down the stairs smiling and waving. She stopped when she saw Sam and I saw a flash of something in her eyes. Anger. Bitterness. Jealousy. She recomposed herself quickly and walked over to me with a very… different look. Suspicion?_

"_Freddie!"_

_She threw her arms around me and I realized what was so different about her._

_She was pregnant._

"_Carly! What… Who's the fa-"_

"_Freddie, hush."_

"_But you're… with child. Who did this to you?"_

_She looked at me with concern, "How can you not remember?"_

"_What do you mean?"_

_She took my left hand. "Look."_

_I did._

_There was a ring on my finger. THE finger- my ring finger._

"_Are we… married?"_

"_We got married two months ago."_

"_So this baby…"_

"_Is yours."_

…

_I learned quickly. I convinced Carly that I just hit my head and was really tired. She stayed to entertain the guests. It was a baby shower. _

_This shouldn't be happening._

_I searched through a lot of junk and learned some interesting and valuable information._

_It goes as follows:_

_I was in an alternate universe. Something somewhere had heard my wish. This was the only explanation for what was happening. This was what my life would be like if Carly liked me back._

_Carly and I had dated since 7__th__ grade. Continuously. I tried to break it off, but couldn't._

_There was no iCarly. _

_Carly was only friends with girls who had boyfriends. She was afraid someone would steal me. _

_Carly hated Sam, who was my best friend. At least, she was until a six months ago._

_Sam kissed me six months ago. No warning, no reason. _

_I liked it._

_Carly did not._

_She got me drunk and used me to get pregnant. I suppose she thought it was the only way she could keep me to herself._

_She tried to kill Sam by running into her with her car. That's how Sam got the scar._

_I knew, but I pretended not to._

_I proposed to Carly._

_We got married._

_I was miserable._

_Apparently, getting what you want is not always effective. In this case, I got something I thought I wanted. I thought I wanted Carly, but she was just a distraction. It seemed obvious now. _

_The problem was: could I fix this? _

…

_I couldn't. I tried, but Sam wouldn't talk to me. Anyway, Carly barely gave me time to go anywhere._

_I was trapped._

_I didn't want to be married at seventeen. I didn't want to be a teenage dad._

_I didn't want to be with Carly._

_I wanted to go to college. I wanted to make a living. I wanted to pursue my dreams._

_I wanted Sam._

_I couldn't do anything to stop it. There was no escape. I couldn't, in good conscience, leave Carly to fend for herself- and the baby. I couldn't even talk to Sam, the one person I cared about most in the world._

_I couldn't fix it._

_I hate things that can't be fixed._

_I sat in the bathtub wondering what to do. Not that there was anything I could do._

_I stared at the water and contemplated suicide. _

_It would feel amazing to escape. It would be so easy._

_To die._

_I wanted to do it. I really wanted to do it._

_I couldn't._

_I decided I would have to use pills. They were the only solution. _

_I took 300 ibuprofen. I didn't know how much would be enough to kill me, but I figured enough of anything would work._

_I lay in bed and wondered if I could get back. _

_If I had one last wish, what would it be?_

**I wish I could go back and tell Sam how I really feel about her.**

I jerked up. I was lying in the middle of an alleyway. I always used it as a shortcut to get home.

My hand!

I pulled my left hand out from under me.

No ring.

Maybe all was not lost.

Maybe…

"SAM!"

I ran down the alleyway, back toward the place I'd left Sam.

I had to tell her that I loved her.

…

**Whatcha think? The next chapter is Sam's alternate reality- what she wished after the same event and how it unfolded. **

**PLEASE REVIEW!**


	9. 2008c

**Disclaimer: I can't even vote yet, of course I don't own iCarly.**

...2008c...

**(This is PART 2)**

Sam's POV

He was staring after Carly like a puppy stares at bacon.

"She's never gonna go out with you."

It just slipped out. I shouldn't have said anything.

He jumped and turned to see me.

"You've been ogling after Carly since you met her. She doesn't like you like that. Give up already."

Shit. I need to learn to shut up.

He frowned.

"She could learn to like me like that. Maybe one day-"

"You never listen, do you?"

Why couldn't he see how much I cared about him? I hated to see him pining after her like that. I even kinda liked him. Just a little. It didn't matter anyway. He'll never look at me like he looks at her.

"Read my lips: SHE. WILL. NEVER. LOVE. YOU. Move on!"

"TO WHO? You said it yourself, Sam-remember? 'No girl you've met will ever go out with you'. And you know what? You're probably right. That's the awful truth. I'll always be Carly's nerdy friend behind the camera. She's the only thread of hope I have. I have to pray that one day, she'll love me and I won't be alone forever!"

I stared at him in shock. I never would've imagined that he felt that way. He was wrong though. There were plenty of girls just waiting for him to ask them out. I always thought he was just so absorbed in Carly that he didn't notice.

"And you-You're one to talk! Boys are too afraid of you to ask you out! Have you ever had a solid relationship? NO! You probably haven't even really liked a guy, HAVE YOU? For all I know, you could be gay. And you think you can give ME romantic advice? You don't care! You never cared about me or Carly or anyone! You only care about yourself!"

I felt numb. Was that what everyone thought of me?

Freddie screamed and ran towards Bushwell.

I sat down on the sidewalk and allowed a few tears to escape my clouded eyes.

What if I'd never been born? Maybe everyone would be better off. All I do is hurt people.

**I wish I was never born.**

_I wiped my eyes and stood. Pucketts don't cry. Pucketts are not weak._

_I wandered off in the direction of home. On my way there, I noticed a middle aged woman staring at me with a quizzical expression._

"_WHAT?"_

_A huge smile broke across her face. "Andy!" she shouted._

"_Who the hell is-"_

_Before I could finish my question, she began running toward me. I tried to sidestep her, but she was already too close. I shut my eyes in anticipation for the collusion._

_A collusion that never came._

_I felt a tickling sensation in my belly and opened my eyes. She was gone. I turned around to continue my trek home and there she was. She was crying and hugging a young man in a military uniform. Her son, perhaps? Maybe that was Andy. _

_Then why had she looked at me? Why had she run at me?_

_She couldn't have changed direction fast enough to avoid bowling me over. Was it possible…_

_Could she have gone THROUGH me?_

_I walked over to a wall and carefully pressed my hand against it. It was solid. My hand didn't pass through it._

_I must be delusional._

_I started through the crowd again when a man started toward me. _

"_What the-"_

_He walked through me._

_I felt the same tickling sensation as before._

_I stood, shocked. Then I started shouting._

"_CAN ANYONE SEE ME? CAN ANYONE HERE SEE ME? AM I DEAD? WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?"_

_No one even looked at me._

_Oh my God. _

_I walked over to the wall again. This time, I imagined that my hand could pass through it._

_It did._

_I stepped through the wall and into the lobby of some random building. I sat down on a bench and put my head in my hands._

_Someone sat on me._

_Actually, someone sat through me._

_My entire body tingled and I scooted away. I must have died. But when? How?_

_Carly and Freddie! They would know!_

_I raced out of the building and toward Bushwell. I ran past Lewbert, who didn't scream at me when I entered for the first time ever. Then again, he couldn't see me._

_I dashed up the stairs and into the Shay's apartment. Carly was there holding a baby. Whose baby?_

"_Damn Corbin and his lies."_

_Whoa. Carly never curses. Who's Corbin? Oh, right. He's our quarterback._

"_He should be helping me! I can't take care of you myself!"_

_She set the baby down in a cradle and collapsed on the couch. _

"_Angie tried to warn me, too. I just thought she was jealous of me. Why didn't I listen?"_

_She picked up a photo and stared at it. She began to cry._

_I looked at the picture Carly was holding. It was of her with the cheerleading squad. No, she was IN the cheerleading squad. I remember her asking once if she should join. I told her that cheerleaders were bitches and I'd never speak to her again if she became one._

_I wandered up the stairs to the iCarly studio. It was just another room full of boxes. It was as if iCarly had never existed._

_When I returned to the main room, I realized there weren't even any pictures of me around._

_How long was I dead?_

_I went over to the Shay's computer. It was a better model than I remembered._

_It was December 24, 2008. _

_The same day Freddie was yelling at me and…_

_Freddie!_

_I jogged out of Carly's apartment and into his. I knew something was wrong as soon as I walked in._

_Freddie's mother was crying hysterically. She was looking at a picture of Freddie. I didn't recognize it. _

_For some reason, I felt sorry for the crazy woman. _

_Why?_

_I'm not sure- it was just a feeling._

_I walked over to his room. It was just as it had been when I last saw it. So what was wrong?_

_I figured it out when I went into Freddie's bathroom. _

_There was dried blood on the floor. It looked weeks old, and I was surprised that Mrs. B didn't clean up. _

_There was a razor blade on the counter along with a note:_

To whom it may concern,

_**I'm sorry it had to end this way, I really am. But I can't take it any longer. The punches, the bruises, and the wedgies were physical. Mr. Franklin stopped most of that. It was the teasing, the cruel words, the absolute hate that I couldn't take. It might be the coward's way out, but it doesn't matter anymore. I just nedde to escape from it all. I assure you, this was all my choice. Do what you will with my things. Don't feel sorry for me. Don't blame yourselves. It was only a matter of time.**_

_**Sincerely,**_

_**Fredward Benson**_

"_Holy shit", I murmured._

"_Freddie killed himself."_

…

_I wandered through the deserted Seattle streets. I's visited Gibby's house. His family moved. He got bullied so much, his mom had him transfer schools._

_I still didn't understand what was happening. It was awful. I wanted to die, but I was already dead._

_**No you aren't.**_

_What the hell? Was that Spencer?_

"_Spencer? Where are you? I can't see you."_

_**That's because I'm in your mind, Sam. **_

"_WHAT?"_

_I started pulling at my hair. Is it possible for a ghost to go insane?_

_**Calm down. **_

_I slowed my breathing and shoved my twitching hands into my pockets. _

"_What do you mean, 'I'm not dead'?"_

_**You're not dead. **_

"_Then why can't anyone see me?"_

_**You're a ghost.**_

"_YOU SAID I WASN'T DEAD!"_

_**You're a ghost of what could have been.**_

"_What the hell is that supposed to mean?"_

_**You wished you were never born. This is 2008c, your alternate reality. This is what the world would be like if you had never been born.**_

"_Holy crap. But what happened to everyone? What happened to Gibby? Carly and Freddie? What happened to YOU?"_

_**I went back to law school.**_

"_WHY? You said those were the worst four days of your life!"_

_**There was nobody that believed in my art. **_

"_What about Carly and Freddie? And Gibby?"_

_**Carly and Freddie were never really friends. Gibby stayed an outsider. You weren't there to protect your friends. They need you. They've always needed you.**_

"_I'm confused."_

_**Since Carly never met you, she became one of the popular girls you've always despised. One of the jocks knocked her up. You weren't there to warn her. **_

"_What about Gibby?"_

_**Carly was popular and ignored him. Being friends with Freddie didn't help him. He didn't have friends to stand up for him. The kids at school bullied him ten times more than you ever did.**_

_I was speechless. But I had one more question. I had to know. _

"_Freddie?" it came out like a whisper. I was terrified of whet the answer might be._

_There was silence for a while._

_**You were the only perfect thing in Freddie's life. Carly may have been sweet to him, but she always turned him away when he wanted more than friendship. Gibby is nice and might've saved him here, but his family moved away because of all the bullying. He needed you there to push him. He needed someone to keep him on his toes and make him stronger, smarter. In your reality, everyone else knew he was yours to bully, and they never questioned it. You protected him. You made him a better man.**_

_I cried. There was no keeping it in. Fresh, hot waves of tears washed over me. _

"_Spencer, please. You have to take me back. I want to go home. I've learned my lesson now. I can't stay here. Take me back."_

_No response._

"_SPENCER! You can't go! I need you to… to take me back to him. PLEASE!" I cried hysterically._

"_SPENCER! Don't leave me here! SPENCER!"_

_IN my heart, I knew he'd gone. I collapsed and broke out into huge, racking sobs. I couldn't breathe._

I cried through the night. My throat was hoarse and I wanted to die. But I couldn't die. I'd never existed.

"Ma'am? Are you okay?"

I looked up and saw a boy, probably ten or eleven years old, looking at me.

"Ma'am?" he asked in that sweet, twangy accent.

I looked around me to be sure, "You can see me?"

He nodded, looking rather confused.

"THANK GOD!"

I jumped up, tears clouding my vision. This time, I cried for joy, not sadness. Everything was going to be okay. Carly, Gibby, Spencer. Freddie.

I kissed the boy on the cheek. "Thank you. You have no idea what I've been through."

I jogged toward Bushwell, not caring where I was or how I got there.

Only caring about him.

Knowing I had to see him.

Freddie.

…

**PLEASE REVIEW! **

**BTW:**

**MERRY CHRISTMAS!**


	10. Reality

**Disclaimer: I'm getting tired of telling you this. **

**GET IT THROUGH YOUR TEENY TINY SKULLS- I AM A TEEN GIRL, NOT DAN SCNEIDER!**

** I DO NOT OWN ICARLY, OKAY?**

**Geez.**

...Reality...

**(This is PART 3, where parts 1 & 2 are linked together)**

The sensitive boy darted through the busy streets to find her, screaming her name as he ran.

The headstrong blonde raced toward his home, tears in her eyes.

The two heartsick teens collided outside their favorite smoothie shop.

The boy stood and brushed off his perfectly ironed jeans.

The girl bounced back up like a superball, her reflexes managing to catch her.

The boy, being a gentleman, turned to apologize.

The apology caught in his throat.

"Sam?" he asked in disbelief.

Blue eyes met brown and the girl's jaw dropped in amazement.

"Freddie?" she managed to squeak out.

Neither knew what to say. This moment was so perfect in their minds. It was as if they had forgotten how to speak.

Finally, the heavy curtain of silence was broken when the brunette boy spoke.

"Care to take a walk?"

The tiny blonde smiled and took his hand.

They continued in silence for a time, hand in hand.

The girl kept looking at the boy like he would disappear.

The boy seemed afraid that she would run off.

"Freddie, I'm sorry. I…"

She trailed off as she saw the look on the boy's face. His deep brown eyes seemed filled with longing, relief, and hope.

"It doesn't matter."

She looked at him, confusion flooding her features.

"But I thought-"

"I love you."

She let go of his hand in surprise.

"You… you what?"

The shy boy stared at the ground.

The blonde began to laugh. Her face lit up as she grabbed the boy's freezing fingers.

"Oh, Freddie. What took you so long?"

His head jerked up.

The blonde grinned at him and laced her fingers through his hair.

"I've known you since second grade, my friend. You should know- when a girl constantly rags on a guy, it means she likes him."

The boy grabbed her waist impulsively and kissed her.

They fit together perfectly, like opposites that only make sense together.

They pulled away gingerly.

"Merry, Christmas, Sam."

The girl leaned her head on his shoulder.

"Merry Christmas, Freddie."

…

**REVIEW!**


	11. True Love?

**Disclaimer: What do you want me to say? I don't own iCarly, okay? And... well neither does Dan Schneider.**

**He sold it to Mandy.**

...True Love?...

**(**Random drabble I made up after reading a oneshot about acrostic poems)****

_What does TRUE LOVE really mean anyway?_

**Sam:**

**T**reats me like I'm special.

**R**espects my love of meat.

**U**nderstands me and my constant state of hunger.

**E**njoys spending time with me.

**L**oves me. And fried chicken.

**O**nly yells during MMA fighting.

**V**erifies that, yes, I still love ham better.

**E**xcites me more than fat cakes.

**Freddie:**

**T**reats me like I'm special.

**R**espects my intelligence.

**U**nderstands my crazy mother, or at least tolerates her.

**E**njoys spending time with me.

**L**oves me. And my tech-talk.

**O**nly yells at mistakes in textbooks.

**V**erifies that, yes, I'm the smart one.

**E**xcites me more than my new laptop.

**When these two try to interpret it, it seems pretty obvious that their love isn't true love, or even love.**

**But true love is overrated.**

**D**esperately tries to win my love.

**E**njoys every painful second we're together.

**V**etoes all my best ideas because I love to fight.

**O**nly cries while laughing at stupid deaths in slasher movies.

**T**reats me like I'm special.

**I**gnores the dumb mistakes I made in the past and looks to the future instead.

**O**nly cares about me, not my crazy family.

**N**otices when I need someone to comfort me.

**T**olerates the worst moments.

**R**elishes the best ones.

**U**nderstands me even better than I understand myself.

**S**tands up for me.

**T**eaches me to love.

…

**The oneshot is "ilove acrostic poems" by seddie perfection.**

**You should definitely read it- it made me laugh. **

**PLEASE REVIEW!**


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